the daily snivel

  Who is your hero?

Talking Points Memo, a blog I read almost daily, is highlighting a video clip featuring Ben Barnes, the former Speaker of the House in Texas. Evidently this is the man who got President Bush into the Texas Air National Guard at a time when many were seeking this haven from the draft during the Vietnam war. He has this to say about that exercise of influence for the sons of the wealthy:

Let’s talk a minute about John Kerry and George Bush and I know them both. And I’m not name dropping to say I know ‘em both. I got a young man named George W. Bush in the National Guard when I was Lt. Gov. of Texas and I’m not necessarily proud of that. But I did it. And I got a lot of other people into the National Guard because I thought that was what people should do, when you're in office you helped a lot of rich people. And I walked through the Vietnam Memorial the other day and I looked at the names of the people that died in Vietnam and I became more ashamed of myself than I have ever been because it was the worst thing that I did was that I helped a lot of wealthy supporters and a lot of people who had family names of importance get into the National Guard and I’m very sorry about that and I’m very ashamed and I apologize to you as voters of Texas.

The clip is here.

I have become so sickened by the flinging of slime during this election campaign, if not surprised (given that this is one of the most contentious and divisive elections in American history). I am especially upset with the brutal character assassination attempts by the Bush administration and its friends in the Swift Boat Veterans for Politically Motivated Lies Truth. John Kerry went to Vietnam, and both the accounts of eyewitnesses and military records establish beyond any reasonable doubt, debate, or discourse that he acted heroically, was wounded in action on at least three occasions, and deserved the medals he has been awarded. The only motivation behind these lies is to plant the idea in a largely uncritical media that these objective historical facts have ever been open to interpretation. And as every day passes by and we see not only the incontrovertible contradictions to the nearly every SBV claim, but also the exposure of many political, personal, and financial ties between this group and Karl Rove, the Republican Party, and the White House.

Bush has only gone so far as to clamor for an end to "shadowy attacks." He has never condemned the group's tactics. Nor would he, as these dirty tricks served him well in 2000 just as they serve him well now. The formula? Don't just attack your opponent's weaknesses. Make weaknesses up ("flip flopper" and "unstable" and now "lying about his service"), especially when they undermine an opponent's greatest strengths (military service in wartime).

What happened to the time when people made honesty a heroic trait? What about self-sacrifice? What about standing up for what you believe in? When I look at most politicians these days, all I see is dissembling and self-interest and catchphrases like "Common Sense Revolution" and "Compassionate Conservative" that imply a great deal more than they actually deliver.

I had a conversation with a friend this week in which I lamented over my observation that what really seems to matter these days is winning. Winners -- those who come ahead and place first -- are our heroes, be it in sports or politics or journalism or schooling. And that isn't inherently a bad thing. Excellence is something to strive for, and a great shame would it be if people allowed their natural talents to lie fallow, or failed to pursue their dreams. But the idea of winning at all costs, instead of "how you play the game," is something I find even more shameful. Cheating has become increasingly fashionable -- and is acceptable insofar as it is rarely caught and seldom punished meaningfully. Cheating is done in politics by lying, dissembling, slandering, and allowing influence to overcome merit and virtue. Cheating in sport is done by an increasing abuse of performance-enhancing drugs (and this is probably as prevalent in high school and university sports as it is among Olympic athletes and professional athletes). Journalists cheat by making up facts, plagiarizing stories, and failing to critically evaluate stories and sources, to the detriment of a woefully misinformed public. Students cheat too. Everyone's heard of the law school legends of people who tear cases out of library books, and everyone knows someone who downloaded his or her essay off the internet. Earlier this summer I talked about the disappointing story of a friend who gave in and let her friend know what to expect an exam she had deferred.

What it boils down to is that it's the result that matters. It's the big bucks or the degree or winning the election or the prize. Whatever it is, if there's a faster and easier way to do it, then this is the way to do it, no matter the cost to integrity. And no matter the hard-working people you trounce whilst on the way up.

When did we stop celebrating integrity, hard work, honesty, and playing by the rules? When did our heroes just become the people who win? And why is winning so important in the first place? I think there is a great deal more to be gained by doing something because you love it and therefore seeing it as worth doing well, whether or not it pays as well or gets you ahead.

Or am I just idealistically thinking people ever really cared about these things?

Well, anyway, I care about these things. And I have nothing but contempt for those who do not.

Update: More on the Barnes and Bush story here.  

  Some badly needed housekeeping...

Among the many other relaxing things I did this weekend, I decided to update the format of my website a little, because I noticed (while in various Toronto cybercafes) that the background graphic for my index page wasn't large enough for huge display resolutions, and that there was a bit of noise in the graphic that looked terrible on those same large screens when the image tiled. So that should definitely be looking better now (and perhaps those of you with big, luxurious displays can let me know for sure, since I'm confined to my 12" iBook display at 1024x768).

I also went back and began reformatting my older Daily Snivel archives from 1997-2002 so as to make them consistent with my current Blogger-era entries. I insterted some CSS styles and got rid of a lot of the <pre> and <tt> tags that I was enamoured with when I was a lad. I also got rid of the atricious alternating green and blue font colours that I used to make the text more "readable" back in the day (what was I on?). I've only updated the first 60 archive files (spanning a year and a half between 1997-1998), but it's a good start and I finally like how it looks. Everything is a lot cleaner, easier on the eyes, and looks like it belongs on a mature website that's been running for 7 years, versus one that was set up hurriedly over a weekend by someone who's never done this before. I don't know who (Microsoft) decided to (Microsoft) make Times New (Microsoft) Roman the default display font on web browsers, but it's ghastly.

But, for the first time in years, I got a chance to re-read my old entries as I was inserted CSS code and deleting bad HTML and archaic nuisance tags. I think what's impress me most is that I've really grown in these years. Starting out, all I did was whine about Leah (known then by her pseudonym "Lilith") and worry about lots of little details. I obsessed about whether the phone rang. I obsessed about getting enough attention from people. I obsessed about roommates. I obsessed about classes that I didn't really enjoy, and heavily procrastinated getting work done in them for that reason. In short, I really obsessed about everything. I must have driven people crazy sometimes. In fact I know I did, because I obsessed over that too, and wrote about it.

I'm much more relaxed and balanced now. It's gratifying. I'm happy with the direction -- heck, I have direction, period. I love my classes, I love my work, and I'm happy in my life and with the people around me. I may not be getting all the lovin' I might like, but I'm not whining about it either. I don't base my days on who calls when and how appreciated I feel. I don't pine for unrequited loves. I spend more time writing about things that matter, and engaging in analysis and critique of current events, than I do complaining about things I could change if only I tried. Nowadays, I do change things that bother me. I'm a year away from starting my Articles of Clerkship as a Student-at-Law -- a year after that (all things going according to plan), I'll be a lawyer. Now, I solve problems for people. I'm carrying 16 cases right now at the Community Legal Clinic. I'm in court every week -- sometimes, it's every day. I have heaps of confidence and personal agency and expertise that I just didn't have before. I'm happy where I am, I have big plans (not just idle dreams), and that's that. I've grown up.

Now, of course, I'm still sentimental and sweet and a little sappy, but I'm not so passive and needy and sullen and moody as I was. Which was always the hook behind my good intentions -- I demanded a lot, read into everything, took little mixups entirely the wrong way, and was fairly high maintenance. Currently, I'm just the troubleshooter, the person other people depend on, a good friend, and far more easygoing. I can just laugh things off, or delve straight into the matter, instead of ceaselessly worrying in vain.

I like seeing where I was back in the Classic Snivel days, because it shows me how far I've come. I don't have the same big bag of regrets anymore. There are things that still bug me, and people I wish I saw more (and still intend to), but it's not the same thing as constantly grousing and lamenting without taking charge and fixing things. I have the same dimples, and in fact I use them more. I don't sulk the way I used to. Heck, I have bigger muscles now, too, because I take my extra energy and anxiety and aggression to the gym, instead of brooding or complaining.

I know some of you have been following these entries since the beginning. How do you feel you've changed since then? 

  Damn you, sucrose!

One of the things I've definitely become leery of is sugary beverages. Whether it is Coke, Fruitopia, or my beloved Jolt Cola, the consumption of these sweet drinks is part of our lifestyle here in North America, and it's safe to say that they probably aren't helping our waistlines any. What was once referred to as a "beer belly" is being worn by more and more children, teenagers, and computer programmers than ever before. In fact, can for can, Coke has more calories than your average beer. And so, given my newfound health and fitness after years of Jolt guzzling and dessert choices, I had to say: "I'd rather have beer than pop." So mostly I just drink water now, or coffee without sugar, and the occasional pint while out with friends.

Anyway, I found a rather good manifesto on the subject that I wanted to share. The website, ChangeThis.com, freely disseminates PDF articles that are generally compelling and interesting to read. I'm specifically endorsing this one, since it rings with something I've long personally held -- that is, we should really cut back on the sugar. Not completely, of course, since a life without cake isn't a life worth living, but we really do put it in everything when we should instead be saving it for something really special. I'd much rather abstain from pop or "fruit" drinks like Fruitopia and instead feel entitled to the occasional chocolate bar, or pint out with friends.